Beneath the Water

Alexa Lukyanov '20

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Some days,
I feel weightless and carefree.
I’m floating.
Waves ripple beneath me,
Pushing me towards the sun.
I swim gracefully across the ocean,
My movements precise and fluid,
Each stroke cutting smoothly across the placid blue. I feel my body propelling me forward,
and I immerse myself in this simple bliss.
Other days,
I am drowning in a bottomless ocean,
Spending an eternity gasping for air,
But never reaching the surface.
My breath is ragged and the water is choppy.
The sound of my ever quickening heartbeat fills my ears, and my lungs fill with water.
I scream and I pray,
But my cries are drowned out by the roar of the ocean. As I succumb to the mighty current,
I finally feel His presence.
He pulls me out of the water,
Giving me air and strength to stay afloat.
I used to see Him in my happiness. In every comforting breeze,
In every smile,
In every carefree moment.
Though that is still true,
That’s not where I feel Him most anymore.
In the darkness,
In the desperation,
In the confusion,
I feel His hand on my shoulder,
Guiding me through times of uncertainty. For God is present in the best of times, but He is close in the worst.

 

Through all the tears,
Through all the storms,
Through every quiet prayer,
He is close and He is listening. Throughout the seemingly endless night, He is there to pull us out of the darkness, and illuminate our lives with His divinity. Therefore, I have never felt true loneliness. For I am never alone.

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